Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

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Syrawenn
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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#161 Post by Syrawenn » Mon Oct 21, 2019 2:41 pm

Fuck.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#162 Post by Syrawenn » Wed Oct 23, 2019 6:00 pm

So, I screwed up. Already knew I ain't relationship material. Now he knows it too.
He was right.
He was simply totally utterly right. I got no relation priorities goin...an tha's bad stuff if ya got someone.

There's friends. They flocked to his rescue.
Good.

I don't need flockin. Just lemme be the bad guy in this.

Talked to Ana. We's gonna do ale an oglin once the trial is done. Comment on all the guys. Get offended if they comment back. Heh.
Considerin a long line of one night stands.
Chit says Ana should have some uncomplicated fun.
Maybe I should too.
But most guys are so....stupidly wussy!

An then there is a guy who might do, turns out he got dealins with Starlight.
GREAT.
Not gonna happen then.
One night stands, I even manage to complicate those.
Pfff.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#163 Post by Syrawenn » Thu Oct 24, 2019 8:02 am

What would dad say?
There's some pretty serious shit goin around right now. I still think they's both right. But yea, that means the information they's goin on don't add up. So, happened to be around when it went down an got to talk to Lil an Rey.
Seperately.
Heh.
An they's both wantin the best, just in their own way. I hear em. Lil, she's so fed up with bein seen as overbearin when she just wants people to see the friggin dangers we're puttin people in when ya start okayin fel crap. Hey, come on guys, I get overbearin too when I see the danger an people don't listen!
Tha's the point ey? Listenin.
But everybody is too busy feelin offended right now instead of listenin to her MESSAGE. Dad would know what to say.

An then there's Rey, who's convinced she ain't bad. An I believe her too. Can't believe anyone can run around fel fer so long an still be Rey. So, then what is it? An why is Lil convinced it IS fel? Words misunderstood? Powers seen?
Haven't got a blimmin clue right now an tha's my job here.
Get the clue.
But that won't happen without me of COURSE first really upsettin BOTH of em.
WAY to go.
In the end I get some info.
An ferget to check who the flip has been feedin Rey that lunacy of lookin at other people's brains.
Mister Swoony?
Hope not. We'll have to get rid of him then.

An then we talk with Ticks. An he says such beautiful things. An he admits he shoulda listen to Rey too. AN he says the thing Ana said at the meet about how people react to choice of words. Yea, tha's the stuff!
Choice of words.
I know the downsides. I talk too fast an that makes people feel they's not heard.
Funny thing being I did hear.
But I reacted too soon.
Gotta learn to let them do the talkin.
Like dad.
An then get in with some words that make em talk even more, so they think it out themselves.

Apologized to Fol, though, explained I DO talk too fast. Made her explain her point anyway. Glad she did. Damnit, people, I LISTEN. I do! But ya gotten listen to each other too! Not just feel what they hurt ya with, but hear the intention, the plan! They's both accusin each other of not hearin the other, go figure.

But we got somewhere yesterday again. Although now Rey don't want to be checked. She got reasons, I get it. But this ain't a trial. This is a feel. A...whatchamacallit? Divination? Tha's like a l'l looksie, right? Like what Rey herself did in them minds. Like she did with Eileena too.
Oh!
Tha's it!
SHE did that herself! So she knows that ain't burnin people! Maybe I got somethin here. But I'll check that diviner myself first. Ain't gonna take risks fer me misunderstandin. I trust Lil to pick a good one. She ain't one to play around with this shit. An maybe Rey will trust me when I explain this shit with her own experiences.
Maybe this works.
Maybe I'll screw it up.

Maybe Anom is just right an I never listen.

Wonder what dad would say.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#164 Post by Syrawenn » Thu Oct 24, 2019 8:57 pm

Okay...maybe then.
Mage an warlock...if she ain't been usin fel much, she may turn back..they's gonna figure it out fer us! Way to go Lil! I KNEW ya'd find people who'd not scare Rey off!
Maybe this will work out.
Please let it work out.
I'll hold the fort, guys, but damnit, I need ya both there with me!

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#165 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Oct 25, 2019 9:28 am

Well shit.
Letter from Anom.
Damnit, you idiot, why do ya have to be so NICE!
It's me, ya dumbass!
But I'll be there, yea. I don't regret our time. Not one bit. Not one day.
An now go find someone who holds to the same timeline you do. Ye'll see. That'll make yer heart happier too.
Cause I'll be an officer an my time will just be less an less.
My words will be mine, but still there's always gonna be Starlight in the back of my mind.
An ya need someone ya can be honest with, without that officer flavourin the talk.
I hope yer right again. I hope yer gonna move on.
Yer always right, Anom.
Be right about this one.
Cause ya deserve it.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#166 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Oct 25, 2019 3:38 pm

It ain't right to hold such power over another.
It ain't right to give out such power to another.
I am sorry, Anom. I really am.
I suck.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#167 Post by Syrawenn » Sat Oct 26, 2019 7:25 am

Score: one hurtin hand an one broken practice dummy.
Sure I can do better than that.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#168 Post by Syrawenn » Sat Oct 26, 2019 9:21 am

Oh I did better: invite to a party.
Said no.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#169 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Nov 01, 2019 2:24 pm

Face feels like it's gonna fall off. Wonder how blue that will turn out. Still got my teeth.
Good.
Otherwise I won't know whether I'm in the dream or not.
Ribs naggin like an old woman.
Muscles screamin.
Goddamnit.
Still, worth it.
Good fight.

Hear the buzz dad is back.
Will go see im soon if he didn't get the rundown already.
Wonder how that'll fall on him.
Pfff.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#170 Post by Syrawenn » Tue Nov 05, 2019 1:18 pm

Shit, shit, shit! Officer trials on saturday!
What are they gonna throw at me?
Shit!

I can do this, alright?
Can't hurt to try.
Right?

Oh boy.

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