Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

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Syrawenn
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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#81 Post by Syrawenn » Wed Jul 03, 2019 6:54 am

Once upon a time.
They lived happily ever after.

There's a mood in Starlight. Been there fer a longer while now.
Not sure if it's just Morrigan. It's like there ain't no happy faces anymore. There's secret pain an barely hidden sorrow behind every pair of eyes.
Is that something that is happening now? Or did I just miss it before?
Sure, I known about some of em fer quite some time now, but...there's Lil fer instance. She ain't around. An she used to be sunshine to many shadows, ya know? An I miss that.
A lot.
We need more sunshine in Starlight.
Imagine that, me sayin that. Me, the master of broodin.

But there ya have it.
An she kinda disappeared from the public after there was some discussin where she was walked all over.
I recognized the moment, the signs, the snap with which her mouth shut and did not open again.
No, I don't think she felt recognized at that moment.
Wonder how Sto is feelin about that.

Sure, we all got our wounds, our frustrations.
But do we really have to fall into despair together?
There should be some real success soon.
Somethin people can feel good about.
Nice boost.
But how?

Buildin on my connections, but I ain't there yet. Got the orphanage set up. It's workin out. Got some out in the streets already, gatherin information. Kids are so much easier to talk to. They ain't half full of their own convictions.
Would be bad to have a fake situation, I guess...but if it's just a game, people won't feel half as good.
So
How do I stir up trouble without havin a 'oh gosh, Syra is in ANOTHER fix?' roll of the eyes while people can still feel good about usin their talents?
Hrmmmm...

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Syrawenn
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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#82 Post by Syrawenn » Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:01 pm

Gotta remember
Gotta remember
Mostly when Im around, no one else is
Gotta remember
Won't have to hear her all the time

I wanna leave
Wanna smash that stone
But if the entire guild is bein taken fer a ride
someone should stay awake

Gotta remember
I'm mostly the only one there.

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Syrawenn
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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#83 Post by Syrawenn » Mon Jul 08, 2019 4:15 pm

I don't think dad realizes they have taken away the safety of the stone. The guildmeets were already a thing with that constant shadow present. Now the same goes for the stone.
Sure, there are some that would trust her.
But there are those that do not.

I do not stand alone. I fear people might actually do what I did not: leave Starlight for loosing that one safe place to chat, to ramble, to argue. I know my impulses. I know them very well. That's why I did not leave. I know that war is not always a thing outside. This time it is a war within Starlight.
And Morrigan might very well mean Starlight's demise because of it.
That is something I will not hand over on a platter.
So I stay.
And I will convince the others to stay.
Cause we gotta remain strong, even if we can't use the stone fer unity anymore.
Right now she is only one and I can't just give her that kind of power over us.

I get that she is a tool.
I get it.
But she is more.
To some.
So I know where this will go: this trial period will turn into somethin indefinitel unless she does somethin incredibly stupid.
Which she won't.
Cause she's bein coached by our own.

So.
Where to ramble when you know in the back of your mind that the shadow might exploit that moment of weakness, that exposure.
Anyone ya talk to might spill their honest worries on the stone.
Fer her to use.
When she finds the kind of people she is lookin fer.

Guess I'm not rambling anymore.
I'll be fine instead.
An listenin.
Cause when the war comes out
We'll know her weaknesses and strengths too.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#84 Post by Syrawenn » Mon Jul 08, 2019 7:20 pm

And then there is communications...
How dare they...
Seriously, how were they ever in their right minds deciding on a one week's deadline without ANY way for someone to find out what the nether was goin on?
NObody posted a note on the wall. I checked! And fer the love of all that ...well, somethin...why...why did not anyone stop to think it might perhaps be a really good idea to at least drop me a line?
Somethin?
ANYthin to warn me?
They all KNOW what the deal is between the Embrace an me. The Embrace an Lakeshire.

Don't tell me they fergot already.

But yea, even though I don't make it to half the meets that I want to go to...they shoulda let me an others know.
They broke the trust of the stone.
Everyone that was there at the last meet and never thought to warn the rest.
Completely.
Without givin anyone a word of warnin who was not there.

Not cool, guys.
Not cool.

Fuck, I gotta find a way to work with this without addin more to dad's shoulders or I'll have to leave anyway.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#85 Post by Syrawenn » Thu Jul 18, 2019 8:45 pm

So...I noticed he did not promise me not to play me next time when I'm actually right.
Figures.
But maybe we got closer to an understandin tonight.

Stoen, TIkal, Chit, Dubs, Lia, Rey, Jingles...They was ALL there at that meet? And not ONE of them thought to tell the others?

Thanks fer nothin, guys.
So much fer unity.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#86 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Jul 19, 2019 4:10 pm

Damn
I think I may be jealous

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Syrawenn
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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#87 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Jul 19, 2019 7:27 pm

Vandos Leafwalker, boss of Ruku, from Magic Leaf.
They wanna do storytellin stuff with us.
Don't ask why.
Maybe cause I kinda tricked Ruku into it.
Mayyyybe.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#88 Post by Syrawenn » Fri Jul 19, 2019 8:32 pm

Okay and one Molly Thornquist wants to help out with flowers fer a next party we organize...what a weird night this is...

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#89 Post by Syrawenn » Sat Jul 20, 2019 6:10 am

An then mister Illidari Greeneyes turns out to be DATIN Molly??? Talkin about beauty and the beast...

An then she asks why I ain't seein someone...pfff...I'm sure she meant well, but damnit. I know I ain't the only one without in the world, but friggin netherbats...didn't know ya could feel so lonely in a group.

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Re: Chaos Continued (ramblings before bedtime)

#90 Post by Syrawenn » Sat Jul 20, 2019 6:55 am

So.
I exploded.
Woops.

Since dad wasn't gonna let it happen, Ticks got the brunt of it, together with whoever was listenin on the stone.
Woops again.
I think I told Lyl of all people to fuck off.
An maybe I advised Dubs to take a flightpoint to the nether.

Tried to explain how the whole stone thing was a major disaster, an again people kept talkin about how goooood it was to have Morrigan closer.
I KNOW
Dontcha know I HATE the fact that it makes sense?
But that's not what it is about an it took a lotta trouble to get that in there: the way it was communicated, or rather...NOT communicated...that there was some kind of thinkin period, a votin period...in which only the few people that were present had a chance.

An it's not just this.
It's more.
People just don't talk anymore!
Silence on the stone, people are 'fine' an nothin ever happens.
Cept it does.
An Lyl fer instance don't even call on the stone fer help.
HOW STUPID IS THAT!
Where the fuck is unity?

So, Ticks did the smart thing.
He called me out.
Damn that elf fer always knowin how to calm me down.
But it was good.
Got to unload all of it.
Even hit him.
Ouch.
Guy's got a jaw like steel.

An I think he even really understood.
An mighta agreed.

So...now I got some thinkin to do.
Cause he just asked me somethin that has been on my mind fer ages.
But I'll prolly be kicked out again before ya know it, cause there is this li'l thing about bein united in front of the guild annnn I dunno if I can keep my trap shut.
Besides that, dunno if an officer is allowed to rant.
An I need to rant.
I need it to think.
To get to the right conclusions ya gotta break through walls.

Yea, officer.
An then there's the trouble with dad bein my dad.
Ya know, seeming favoritism or shit like that.
An then there is the thing where maybe it's right to have a NOT officer speak up an say stuff that others don't wanna say. Maybe that is my part here. Cause as not-officer I might be able to say things that otherwise ain't right.
So
I dunno what the smart thing to do is.
Cause how will I know if people will listen to me cause there is some sense or because of the officer title?
Dunno if I wanna be doubtin that.
Sometimes a title ain't helpin.
Will talk to dad.
If he says no, fine. I'll just do what I always do. I don't need a title fer that.

But Ticks thinks I might actually be listened to.
If I don't get mad all the time.
Well I don't...but I do when stuff is just...when people are....okay so I do get mad a lot but come on! People ain't ALL afraid of me?
Right?
Or are they?
Is that the reason why the only guys that seem to be able to get along with me are older?
Zarcie...damn, where is that guy. Him an Tarnuun gotta compare notes on disappearin.
Ticks
dad

Fine, so tough nuts if I scare em off. Then it would be a disaster anyway. An besides, got a lotta stuff to do.
No time.
An all that.
Yea

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